12,045 Days ......(And Counting)

My affirmation deceitfully severed
forever robbed by selfishness
Left to tackle life alone 
Tumbling in the wake of my dad's mess

He left when I was three 
The crevasse has increased for 33 years
Traded his life with us 
For another woman and a couple of beers

He wasn't there to pick me up
When I fell off of my bike 
To teach me how to fish 
Or enjoy a nature hike

Now I'm a father to my son 
Hoping not to make the same mistake
Living day to day on this lake of life
My son in tow through my own wake

It's been nine years and we're going strong 
Six more years with my son
That's more with him than I had with mine 
My son I guard in a web I've spun

A web of love, discipline, and nurture
Full of "I love you's" and "see ya in the morning"
A kiss before school and one before bed
Lots of playing, talking, reading, and singing

My son doesn't know the pain I feel 
To not know my dad in intimate ways
No hands to comfort me or words to heal
No dad in sight for 12,045 days.............................(and counting) 






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My son and I have a great relationship and for this I am thankful......
Copyright © | Year Posted 2009

Poem

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12
Dietrich Avatar
March 6, 2010 at 9:28 PM
wow,Abe, heartfelt and powerful writing here. I love how you presented this topic of one of the worst kinds of betrayal. A belated congrats for your HM. I'd have put it higher on the list! LUv,Andrea
Brown Avatar
February 26, 2010 at 7:39 AM
Congratulations on your win in Starflixer's Betrayal contest Abe. Love, Carol
Devonshire Avatar
February 25, 2010 at 12:35 PM
You could never make the same mistake your father made, Abe. You have been blessed with a beautiful heart and have grown from this tragic experience. Congratulations on your recognition in the contest. Love, Carolyn
Sweetheart Avatar
February 25, 2010 at 12:30 PM
Congrats Abe on yor winning poem in the Betrayal contest.. a magnificent write.. a wonderful win.. from an amazing poet.. luv.. Linda-Marie..
Moreno Avatar
October 6, 2009 at 12:38 PM
Abe, congratulations on making the first round of the contest...Raul
Gass Avatar
September 30, 2009 at 5:52 AM
Congratulations again, Abe! This is such a wonderfully written piece that can't help but touch ones heart. Best of luck in the finals! Love, Robin
Fish Avatar
September 26, 2009 at 8:23 AM
Cont: Forgive your dad, Abe; it's the best thing you can do for you. I hated mine for thirty years and I was the one who suffered because of it... He couldn't have cared less. Then I raised a step-son whose father is an alcoholic but who has changed his way. Now my son believes he has two dad's and that is an success story. I also raised a daughter and son of my own. Life is good... Great poem, Abe; reckon you can tell I connected with it. Will be watching for your stuff mi amigo. ~<><
Fish Avatar
September 26, 2009 at 8:13 AM
Lost my dad when I was 7 yoa. Was raised by an alcoholic step-ather who hated me for hanging on to my father's memory. Our relationship deteriorated to five years of verbal, physical and sexual abuse which was ended with me pointing a loaded rifle to his face and my mother stepping in front of it. She saved me from prison. I forgave my step-father (15 years later) and the last six months of his life he spent alone, in a hospital, with no one to care for him. ~<><
Crisci Avatar
September 26, 2009 at 12:01 AM
Hi, Abe! congratulations on your first round win. Your poem evokes memories of sadness and hurt I can relate to. You trying to be a better father to your kid, because you were deprived of your father's love and affection. We learn from life and people around us. Some heed the signs and avoid making the same mistakes that make us so miserable. Your poem is so inspiring and emotional. Good luck with the contest. Warm Regards, Andrew.
Richards Avatar
September 24, 2009 at 3:45 PM
Well.......look at Mr Lopez.....with three contending poems in the finals!! Hooray for you!! Well derverved and wishing much good luck in the next round!! ~ Love, Carrie
Devonshire Avatar
September 24, 2009 at 12:56 PM
Three poems in the finals. Way to go, Abe!!! Love, Carolyn
Fraser Avatar
September 24, 2009 at 12:20 PM
Abe, congratulations in getting past round one of the competition, good luck mate >> James
Brown Avatar
September 24, 2009 at 12:03 PM
Congratulations on your 3 poems making it through the first round.Wishing you the best in the finals Abe. Love, Carol
Moreno Avatar
September 22, 2009 at 7:40 PM
Abe, congrats on your feature this week...Raul
Augustus Avatar
September 22, 2009 at 2:40 PM
I kind of connect with this poem in that I really don't have that good of relationship with my father either; but, at this point it a committed effort that both of us have to do. I thank God for my mother and my Heavenly Father and I know that even though my parents have been divorced for most of my life, my mom and I still know that I have an earthly dad that wants to connect with me. By the way, I liked your poem!
Mason Avatar
September 22, 2009 at 10:10 AM
Well bless you Abe that inspite of no role-model you are able to be a good father to your son. I never knew mine. Sometimes life gives us lemons and I'm a great lemonade maker ... smile ... thanks for this wonderful write and congratulations on having it featured this week at the Soup !!
Fraser Avatar
September 22, 2009 at 6:23 AM
Congratulations on your wonderful poetry being featured this week Abe, nice write>>James
Culverhouse Avatar
September 21, 2009 at 12:27 PM
nicely done, congrats on being a featured artist
Brown Avatar
September 21, 2009 at 3:43 AM
Congratulations on your well deserved poetry being featured this week Abe. Love, Carol
Strand Avatar
September 21, 2009 at 12:11 AM
Congrats on your feature poem this week Abe Rgds Brian
Golden Avatar
September 20, 2009 at 9:28 PM
Abe, I would imagine that this piece was cathartic for you. Wonderfully written, and well deserving of fearutred spot this week. Hugs, Donna
Richards Avatar
September 20, 2009 at 5:47 PM
You have turned around what could have created such an unloving, and bitter life....into a wonderful loving father to your own son...God Bless you for changing a family cycle, into a family circle. It gives hope to other people who count the days since they were abandoned by someone they trusted...xoxox much love Abe for who you are! sincerely.... what a worthy featured poem this is.
 Avatar
September 20, 2009 at 4:57 PM
Such a sad situation. The emotion comes though your words. Glad to hear your son and you have a great relationship. Thank you for sharing this heartfelt poem with us. Congratulations on having it featured. Enjoy your honor! Keep up the good writing. Karen
Fraser Avatar
September 14, 2009 at 12:37 PM
My mother left me and my brother when i was 6, to see her again - no thx - we managed without her. Heartfelt write>>James
Eckiwaudah Avatar
May 19, 2009 at 3:17 PM
i love this poem. i to wish i could have a close relatinship with my father. luv cherica.
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