11:23 Pm

11.23pm

Frothy clouds 
and floating waves,
On the rooftop 
while I stargaze.


11.24pm

Though my heart is
stained with darkness,
That's where you'll find 
the brightest stars.

lonelinesslonginglovelove hurtsfree verse

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Frederick Espiritu

July 26, 2016 at 7:41 AM

both are beautiful... I like the second one the most...

Julia Ho

July 26, 2016 at 9:17 AM

Thank you! ^^

Mike Hauser

July 26, 2016 at 7:15 AM

So poetic...nice

Julia Ho

July 26, 2016 at 9:17 AM

Thanks! ^^

Tim Smith

July 25, 2016 at 8:46 PM

I really like these Julia...Can I make a small suggestion?...try removing while in the last line of the first one...I don't think it is necessary.

Julia Ho

July 26, 2016 at 9:33 AM

Thanks for the suggestion! I really like it too if the word is removed as it gives another feeling and meaning to it, but I intend it to flow while it's being read..not trying to create two separate scenes in the stanza. :)