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- End of Time -

I followed your every footsteps, for awhile now. It's leading me to the same spot, that it left you, Marcus. You were my role model, my leader from the start. My best friend from the day that we met in the park. I was your follower, you never complained. You were my leader all just the same. But now, I'm starting to realize. That all through these years, I've been following the wrong guy. Physically, no I've purposely been following you. But your starting to do things that I don't want to do. I am now the leader and you are following me. This is not how it was meant to be. Asking you to stop, you always refuse. You say you won't give up until you have to move. We both know very well, that you will never move. It's a family tradition in where you can not move. I will have to wait until I can move. For I am still to young and my 'family' chooses not to. I now have to make a choice, a huge one on my part. It's starting to dawn on me that you like me. I know very well that you don't break promises. Yet, you promised me that you like me. The real promise is pretty harmful. I can't let you go through with it. You said that if I don't believe you like me, you'll commit suicide. There's one problem with that. I have dysthymia. Incase you don't know what that is. It's pretty much low self-esteem and cutting yourself. I can't believe people when they say they like me. No matter what they do, I just can't, my mind won't allow it. So this may be the end, I really hope not though. Please don't be serious, Marcus. -Yes, this actually happened today (October 20, 2013). I feel really bad that I can't help him. But, I really do have dysthymia and major depression. I have thought about suicide myself, and came pretty close. But I don't want it to happen to anyone else. Especially not Marcus. Thanks..!-

Copyright © | Year Posted 2013




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