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Daylight is greeted with the horrific stench of food chunks swimming in stomach acid, dribbling onto bed sheets. Accompanied with the embarrassment of brown syrup puddle stains. Head is pounding like a hammer - hammering nails into the skull. Cumbersome movements drag drowsy flesh to the mirror, as bloodshot eyes with yellow hue, glare in reflection. Exhausted hands rub dense stubble, as heavy eye lids struggle to stay open. A cocktail of coffee and a cold shower comfort this somber slumber. Mouthwash and mints help disguise the fragrance of yesterday's session with Bourbon. Continuous sips of water, attempt to quench sultry thirst, but the blandness cannot douse untamed flames. Especially as days consist of sitting surrounded by monotonous blank walls, and staring at cracks on a vase - silently watching wilted flowers crumble. Struggling to defeat temptation from fermented demons, summoned by cravings for that burning sensation, the tongue cries for mercy. Infiltrates the mind luring it to lust for sour liquid passion that infuses the bloodstreams. Hands trembling, parched lips quivering - only golden nectar can ease the pain. No need for a glass, as bottle is devoured, with momentary pauses of 'aaahhhhh.' So begins the daily quest, to suffocate every sorrow. To feel numb upon request, with no care for tomorrow. Favouring fantasy over reality, each drop kills the pain. The bitter sweet taste is a lethal injection, but the numbness helps to feel perfection. In a place where nobody notices - alcoholic symphonies lead to intoxicated sympathy. To deal with being alone, to forget the world, to forget the name. Envious eyes can be a crime, leading to jealous tendencies. Hiding secrets can lead to becoming a victim to a self inflicted demise. An empty bottle leads to remorse. Bitter sweet tears roll with shameful giggles. Now the cracked vase looks perfect with flowers blooming. Inebriant melodies mock the mind. Attempting to dance, legs stumble and crash to the ground. Laying there on the floor - laughing. Then crying hysterically. The heart has no desire to be sober, only to remain intoxicated until death. The Silent One 20 October 2017
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