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Who was he? Well if he did not want me he obviously was a jerk. Seriously though, he is one of my sister's friends. Young. Deep introvert telling truth as it is. But he was not so to say "in love enough" to want to share with me his thoughts and whatever else his life is. And if he lived nearby maybe I could just deal with it spending time with him. And at least try to have a kind of relationship to check if I can have a concrete one with him. But he lives far away and not speaking and not writing to me was too painful do bear. And you know, he started with writing to me every day that is why I think I can say not "in love" enough. Because later on he stopped it and wrote less and less and then once a week. And my body broke. It spilt three-quarters of thick heart blood together with two-thirds of water and salt appearing as floods of tears day after day. The toughest time was about three months ago or so. We haven't spoken for over two now. I don't cry anymore. Well I think about it, about him a lot but I rarely cry, let's put it this way. I felt rejected and left. And as some say this is the worst you can do to a girl. And this can be true anyhow. Never know why these things have to happen to me. Why did that have to end up like this. Or maybe this is not the end. But still. Tortures.
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