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(the sequel to A Christmas Story Told By The Dog) Twas the night before Christmas just one year ago, When we had that commotion outside in the snow, With reindeer a-runnin' this way and that, And a strange obese man in a red suit and hat; Who'd snuck down the chimney of all the strange places. Guess he thought that way he'd leave fewer traces. The folks were at church, they were gone for the evening. The house was empty, at least it was seeming; But I and the cat had been left on guard, And when he entered we brought him down hard. I fastened my teeth 'round his ankle and then, The cat screamed and scratched him from eyebrows to chin. He screamed and he scrambled back whence he came. As I grabbed his bahunkus he called me a name. He made it to roof and jumped in his sleigh, And the reindeer took off in a fast get away. They hit some old lady out in the street, Swooping low for momentum for a speedy retreat. The house was a shambles, the front yard a mess, And I'm sure that old lady felt less than blessed. I sit here remembering one year ago, And all that commotion outside in the snow. All of a sudden I heard a sound, And the cat hit the window in one mighty bound. He let out a screech that sent chills up my back. I can scarcely believe it but that sucker's back. This time he skipped us and went next door. Just wait till he meets their black labrador; For he still remembers that terrible night, And you can be certain he'll put up a fight. Merry Christmas, Y'all
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