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Where did I leave off?  Oh, yeah...conditions...Next up is Arthritis- this only in last 
year or so- endless, 24/7 chronic pain...Even in bed...it brings tears to my 
eyes...and nothing less than a strong Vicodin does anything...and I rarely get that 
because it's addictive, and controlled...once, not long ago, at my old house in 
Queens, during a jam, a guitarist asked if he could have one, his back was 
troubling him, I said okay....later, after they left, I went down for a dose due, and 
low and behold, he took the entire jar...near 30 pills....next time he came you 
should'a heard my greeting...never saw him again...back to conditions...when 
this cancer thing started, I became severely depressed, and sleepless- chronic 
insomnia these many years- typically, I am awake 5-6 days, and once for 8...let 
me tell you, your mind turns to oatmeal....you haven't a clue...it is not pleasant, 
especially if you are in constant chronic pain....Woweee!!!  I was prescribed 
sleeping pills (Ambien)- and it worked, but again a controlled substance, 
addictive, I admit to it doing that to me...and I have been long cut off from it, I 
would wind up using a months supply in a week, as my body got used to it....so 
here we are....watchin' TV in bed thru the night...ugh,,..this delight came with it's 
twin, depression....a new customer for it...together, it's a good thing I don't have a 
gun (seen too many murders up close..another story...) cause I have been in 
psych wards for this feeling...the balance I'll just name, they should be familiar to 
everybody...continued

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