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Wow, look, we can save $500! I wonder how much we must invest to generate this savings. Oh, I see. We need only buy a new or used car, which, of course, as everyone knows, is something that we truly truly need, like a thneed. Yet another car or truck to insure and register and feed full of fuel and maintain and repair. And don't forget those exhaustive system screenings to be sure you are not doing more than your fair share to poison our over-exhausted and under-fed air. Seems like too high a price to save so little. I think we shall pass on this less than overwhelming offer. What's next? Oh yes, the cell phone bill. I wonder how they will help us save money this month. I could use a direct line to God about all this junk mail and these bills for services not so generously, or even cooperatively, delivered. I could save a lot of money by not talking to anyone and not going anywhere, although I could not swear I have been going from here to there for quite some time now, and I could confine my thirsts to tap water, which does not cost so awfully much compared to cell phone liquidity. But, to really save time and money I would make a long-term commitment to this reclusive lifestyle, and downsize to an old geezer tricycle with a cargo basket on the front, and a Slow Moving Vehicle sign strapped onto my back. Children going by would suspect me of false advertising: Mom, look, he isn't moving at all. Is he for target practice?... Oh Mom, how could you possibly have missed him, you drove right by, his cap still flies, carried by the wind of our cadillac of sales. Yet false advertising has itself become culturally addictive. So much easier than owning up to what we really have to bargain-basement sell. Which is nothing, I think? Mom, shouldn't he be wearing black? And shouldn't he have a long straggling grey beard and black brimmed hat and not that University of Michigan ball cap. That's not right at all, that whole situation of maladaptive addiction. Better call the police, the crazies got off pathology's reservations again. I suppose it would be maladaptively psycho to save all that much money, and for what new or better fed addictions? A person can only eat so much ice cream without developing permanent runs, and what else would I want to buy with all that saved up money? Regardless, to really really save money and time it would help so much to know what for, to what other alternative investments. Divestments of habitual climate challenging addictions, like anger management, require much less raw will power-over short-term thinking ego's autonomic habits of mind and body, when floating in new rivers of healthier adaptations to Earth's resonant climatic opportunities with ever greater power-with warmth, invitation, grace resetting kosmic karma's sights from addiction within culture's BusinessAsUsual pathologies in favor of Earth's felt and believed beautiful polypathic truths of timeless climate health, yin within as yang without, anima's spirited love-invoking animus vestments of co-incorporated ecopolitical power. Oh yes, I know, let me fully invest in a new Recreational Vehicle to drive and fly away from all this savings of self and other and Earth, never planning to return to this asceticism without aesthetics of co-invested, though curiously humored, pilgrims. Looking for ever renewing ways to save 500 dollars.
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