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Poem

I hunger inside
To grow and grow forever
do I want to stay?

I hunger inside 
to grow and explore all that is new
yet it means to toss away the old
my old life and old self
and embrace the new

It’s hard to let go
to finally let go of everything
to give up your old world
all of it’s treasures and turmoil
that you’ve grown comfortable within

to just let go of yourself

and walk across a bridge that you don’t know where it leads
just that it leads to God
to another version of yourself
a better version of yourself that you don’t know if you will end up enjoy being
a version you are not sure you will love better than this one

Change: a metamorphosis turning destruction into order again 
It’s scary and frustrating and humbling
to see all of your flaws and mistakes and areas to improve
all laid out before yourself

all of the areas you can never travel down again
that needs to be pruned away and cut off
that you had good memories and enjoyment from
yet they are inherently flawed and destructive 
leading no where good

There is this temptation to not go on
to stay where you are and enjoy the plateau 
that you know will be destroyed away by a meteor in just a little while
but you want to live in your illusion
that things are good as they are

To not accept the reality verses dream of the situation
that it doesn’t operate how you wish it to be
and even though It makes sense that it can be, it won’’t conform to your ideals 

I need to give all that I am to God
and just trust the process
To do the best that I can

This is my transformation

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