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"come on, get your coat off, its bloody ten too" not even eleven and there forming a que "just a barmaid" thats what they say service with a smile, expected all day we are more than just pint pourers , were councillors too we listen to it all, oh what we go through "here you go thats £3;40" "how bloody much?" sir its not 1940 we get the blame for the price of a pint we have to clean the toilets, oh the shear delight we love listening to you drunk moan of how you have it bad while we are trying to multi task, serving your dad when you whislte, shout, bang or wave your money believe me babe you aint getting served in a hurry when we dont know there names but we no them by drink "come on you know him, half a mild, he stinks" dont get me wrong its not all doom and gloom we do have a laugh with a crowded room serving two at once thinking your pro then looking up and seeing no hope 4 deep at the bar making no eye contact keepin your head down thats a fact when all your buttons are pressed and your sweaty too boot when all all want to do is put the drunks on mute when you see that one walk in whose fussy as f&@£ all the staff fled, just my luck fake smile cracks across my face "usual Doris "full of grace large glass, small wine, two cubes and soda if i had a gun i think i would probably load her we listen to stories of, cats funerals, shopping lists and worse but if you dont listen you will get the barmaids curse your name will be rotten about the town of how you arent pleasant and wear a frown they think were arsed but really we are were just a helping hand from across the bar we like a good laugh and banter is fun sometimes rude, excuse the pun we have our yocal locals who we love and think are ok but its still nice to say "Tarra" after theyve been in all day weve got pat with a bitter, a cider shandy if pissed ste on coors light showing his fist fran on gin, vodka or red dom on anything, its time for bed jenny on bacardi and diet coke kyrin on spiced rum and abit of a toke the other corinne on rosay until she can walk no more dave hardwood on whiskey until he falls to the floor margie on brandy and a drop of lemo amie on different things the alcohol pro lyndsey drinking fruit-bowels like its going out of fashion jordan on shots like its his passion then there is the two lovely barb and kipper we do like him because hes a good tipper so from us "just barmaids" please know our worth we our here for You, we are the salt of the earth
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