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Hope and…a father is could be Against all odds and expectations so many rules and norms and clever theories society’s demands cultures and conventions there is no magic wand no miracle solution I throw you high up in the air and catch the giggled strength and heartfelt laughter companionship rising high in motion slow and fast emotion reflected suspense of moments passing by until my hands and shelter embrace you when again I have to let you go to fly from our roots confirming journey We swim the ocean brace the waves contend the currents time the tides and titillating surf taste the water salt and progress from distant shore to open seas with the calculated risk to need a boat for all the necessary safety and return At times I wish to push the river hold it halt you be your life raft when the river flows itself and you need to dip in different waters have to struggle on your own until there is another river never yet the same for now and then From the tree of life we swing from vital vigour bark and leafy pleasures pull the pulley push a plank balance from even higher branches or build a ladder to the tree house where the fantasies are swelling into pictures and experience in your sense-world and your mind We read and listen and explore skip the home-work find our own words full of mystery imagination entertain a fairy tale away from grim prescription scribe our story as it should write our own create and play on the fields of fancy poetry and comprehension meaning We sign the goal posts where you my sons and daughters wrestle kick their shins scratched knees and footballs score for team and individual satisfaction test the limitations and discover the rules they wish to follow and the ones they wish to stretch Clothed in mud and perspiration we turn around walk back to our abode meshing webbing sense perception movement understanding eat ice cream with gravy roast potatoes topped with chocolate puffs and gummy bears We make our time a market place decide what goods are good resist temptation and indulge forget remember and forgive not just the temper tantrums at the check out mine and yours that is recast and sculpture what matters most We organize the shelves not always in the senseless order put soap with meatballs in the freezer and flower seeds with books where they belong when we escalate and stop in time for reason You push me round the shops in trolleys run up descending escalators practice for the topsy-turvy demarcation that adult being holds in store too much too far too early and resist the fallacy that only one way leads to where the happiness is found Life will not always be the pleasant circus where clown and jester mocks the foolish wisdom clarifies the laughing sadness bruising hurts where bigger picture parades in masquerade of tidy tiny universal sanity and madness preventing what love and kindness would suggest to be the better option I may be somewhat helpless when your hearts are broken so labelled real reality sets in when friends betray you toxic poisonous encounters lie in waiting When fate surprises curve balls broken branches riptides swings cul-de-sacs and roundabouts loom and call for your resilience for the application of what you’ve got For not a day though I would have missed your childhood when most likely you taught me more than I could give The time will come when I will need and wish for more support and guidance when you can be the fool wise man and guiding daughter when my trolley is the wheel chair in the wheel of life and I am truly of that trolley When ageing sight drifts and falters where bones might crumble mind could vanish and regress Time for your foresight hindsight vision and the dreams and aspirations of your children’s father mother guider and protector never loosing sight of childhood and hopefully incorporating the imperfect wishful father good enough at times I try to be
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