Email Poem

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Poem

I am...
I am...
I am...unbelievably selfish
I am...
I am...
I am...a different someone lately
Please not another question mark
I'll explain
My friends, my closest
are just silently drifting away
silently drifting away from me
I mean I should be happy right
They all have something going on in their lives
I mean I should build them up
be proud for them and what their going through
but being proud doesn't replace
the static of the empty sounds surround me
Adryanna, Belle, Juliet, Felicity
Lilly, Silver
My closest friends in a nutshell
the very same friends who drive me insane
and up the wall
who I'd fight for and save them all
there they are
floating away on separate clouds
away from me
Who am I kidding
Were they ever meant to stay
I've lost some of them more than once
I've lost some of them
the same way I am now
What is wrong with me
Is it just out of jealousy
that someone else is stealing my girls away from me
Or could it be that I want to be
the only one they say they always need
What is wrong with me
Is it really out of fear of being stuck alone
in my self indulged interspace
singing sad songs for days
thinking of their collective faces
wondering how their making out
while I'm wishing I was anywhere with anyone
making out
What is wrong with me
I guess I...
I guess I...
I guess I...
I don't even know
I...I don't know
I love them
I love our good times
I fear for the loss of those memories
I fear for the replacement of me
I'm obviously boring and easy to forget...
Why am I so hard on myself...
I want them to be happy
and if somebody else makes them that way
then I should be okay
but...I always want that someone to be me
Do I know who I am
No...but I wish I did
Do I know who I am
Mr. Romantic
but Mr. Romantic
just became Hopeless
Au Revoir

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