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PATIENCE AND NICOTINE


“coffee, two sugars, hold the cream please”

home made filtered cigarettes
bitterly cutting the cost.
too many books on the floor and the walls.

he cooks dinner – chicken and au gratin potatoes –

“put more potatoes. it lasts longer.”

cars speed on M-72 – noisy speed – 
the dog licks herself desperate 
with nothing else to do

birds chatter from one cage to another
and I am lost in normality
with my freedom strangled 
in dusty curtains and a sinkfull of dirty dishes.

“do they have cats in Baghdad? CNN didn’t say.”

car insurance is due – life is due.

he cooks dinner
“did you put more potatoes?’

I wait for what is mine,
maybe a knock on the window
in the morning or at midnight,
but he kisses me and rushes in the kitchen.
today I look old with my life at a lent starving
I’m unplugged from today – no spices
“how was your day?” “fine. yours?”  “fine.”
slice, spice, butter, bake.

I didn’t laugh or cry today

no twittering of blue birds
just screams and groans of a mad beast
that bites foaming, clawing the wrinkled skin.

we are two old statues in the park
and pigeons shit on us
because we forgot to be drunk on foolishness.

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