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The year was 1956 and I distinctly recall my mother's lovely face as she told me Szererlek (I love you) and as I seen her lovely smile I remember her face as she held back bittersweet tears tying to hold the impression that everything was alright and I as a youth did not fully comprehend the situation going on at the time....... I asked my mother Anyu , miért sírsz ? (Mother, why are you crying?) and she replied.... Ez semmi fiam , én rendben lesz (It's nothing my son, I will be alright) all while hearing the rough and very bitter voice of my father say...... Nidia , te ribanc ! hol vagytok ?! (Nidia, you whore! where are you?!) all while she bitterly weeps going to his side again, once more in his violent tone he says...... Nidia , te kurva ! hol van az italom ?! (Nidia, you bitch ! where is my drink?!) all while she wept quietly going to the refrigerator and getting his stale cognac and bitter wine all while these two drinks have not even gotten cold yet...... She serves him the drinks he spits them out, get's up and says..... Te hülye kurva !, akkor soha semmit van! (You stupid whore!, you could never do anything right!) as again I see daddy, giving mommy one of his usual love taps a punch to the stomach and a slap to the face all to match the black eye she has already received..... It is 12:00 at night I lay in my bed...... mommy kisses me goodnight and she says in a soft, calming whisper Ez semmi fiam , én rendben lesz (It's nothing my son, I will be alright) all while daddy was asleep in the other room, knocked out from having his usual cocktail of painkillers, stale cognac and bitter while this time...... it was cold Mommy tucks me in kisses me on the forehead cuts off my lights and says.... jóéjt fiam (goodnight my son) I..... still awake, and with the inability to slumber I sneak out my bedside and witness in my mothers hands, the Ak-47 assault rifle that my father had stole during the Hungarian revolution...... My father (who was knocked out) was unaware of what was staring at him in the face...... and my mother...... with her hand on the trigger says in her melancholy voice...... ez a vég.....(this is the end.....) and puts a bullet through his head.....
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