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I thought of you today.  I think of you every hour of every day. I remember how tender were our moments, how sweet was our love. Although we're no longer together, I'm writing you a love letter because I still love you. It's said that a signed love letter becomes an autograph of affection. My affection fills pages and pages of poems that you will never read. I write of things I no longer have the chance to say to you; words of passion, fear, anger, but also of our dreams and the times I hold most dear.

memories I hold
   flow within my broken heart
       we are far apart

     We shared so many dreams. I remember the song you wrote for me, 'Eternally.'  You played it for me when first we met. You had no idea how I struggled to hold back my tears. I was torn between watching your face as you played, and your fingers as they caressed the keys. I imagined them moving gently over me. I drank in the moment, thirsty for you.  Was I imagining that you loved me, too? No, I knew your heart loved mine, even before we came face to face. I remember the day you took my hand, kissed my palm, and knelt on one knee.  "Yes," I cried, and I saw the tears in your eyes for the want of me.

memories of you
     of your eyes and your laughter
          love ever after

     Love was the greatest gift we gave to each other, but it's supposed to endure all things; eternally. I remember the night we stood gazing at a million stars in the Colorado sky. You wrapped your arms around me as one fell. How sad to think of a star dying. How sad to think that now, when I look at the stars, I feel your arms around me. Do you think of me and remember? You asked me to write a poem about the fallen stars, wondering where they go when they die. The last line was, "Heartache is elusive to the human eye." I no longer believe that to be true. I see my heartache each time I look in a mirror and your reflection is not standing next to me. Your head does not lie on the pillow next to mine. Your arms no longer hold me as we sleep. Our eyes no longer gaze into each others, but my heart still holds you with each beat.

memories of us
     gazing at the midnight sky
          one more fallen star

     I'm sending you my autograph of affection. I've signed it, "With love." I fold and place it an envelope, addressed to the home we once shared. I'm sealing it with my tears and adding it to the others. They're tied with a crimson ribbon, safely kept in my desk drawer.

one more love letter
     written by my broken heart
          you will never read.



November 14th, 2015
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