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I was listening to Cornell West, who described our catastrophic tolerance of disvalues for others, situations we would never tolerate for ourselves, disvalues like homelessness and hunger, but also like random violence, abuse and neglect, lack of caring, as a "conspiracy" of a dominating, oppressive, and competitive culture. Conspiracy theories make me nervous about the theorist, but West reassured us that he shares this concern, yet even with all that concern taken into account, perhaps this is a conspiracy in the same sense that cultural and climate evolutions always appear, in hindsight, as if genius inspired, intelligently planned, spontaneously networking a magically coincidental outcome. Positive integrity sometimes, and sometimes more about this mystery of tolerating oppressive and suppressive disvalues for others, with apparent equanimity, unaware of any cognitive dissonance, without active antipathy, or even passive awareness, total absence of compassion, lack of mindfulness, lack of consciousness; unconscious hypocrisy. Our own comfort with self v. other values, tolerable disvalues becoming traumatic conspiracies. Deep dark miracles? Yet, conspiracy or not, if self-contentment is possible while hypocritically accepting intolerable losses and suffering, abuse and neglect, for other: species, Earth ecosystems, nations, cultures, neighborhoods, even estranged family members, then we sometimes could choose words like irrational, rabid, irresponsible, lack of appropriate accountability, lack of capacity for compassion, lack of awareness, consciousness, hateful, stupid, mentally diseased, sociopathology, chronic trauma, a hypocritical living death, disassociated cuts by a thousand ego-feathered knives. We work this competitive hypocrisy on each other, against each other, and sometimes with each other-- we call that dark humor. I do not feel possessed when my internal empathic voice tells me that my monocultural competitive environment is over-invested in undervaluing significant dimensions of who we naturally and cooperatively are, our care-giving and loving, our tenderness and peace-seeking, our tendency to side with underdogs and understories, our endless fascination with root systems and nutritious blossoms, seasonal development patterns and changing weather, birdsong and surf sounds, resonant breathing and heart-beat rhythms, blood flow nutritional capacities, consumption and production of healthy nutrients within any care-sharing paradigm that might come to mind heart root systemic awareness. I get it that I live in a culture diseducating ourselves about Darwin's evolution including thrival of the fittest cooperative relationships by focusing on mere survival; cultural hypocrisy miraculously conspired through our sins of omission, more salient than our grace of cooperative inclusion, because of collective cognitive dissonance where we need compassion's cognitive confluence. Perhaps a more resonant resolution of consciousness calls us to slow down and decompose our analysis of deviance as sometimes negative and sometimes positive but always some of both. I struggle to hold a heuristic safe-space for positive conspiracy. My cognitive dissonance radar longing to perceive conspiracy itself as having two faces. In this way I begin to claim my healing passion place in our shared orthodoxy of truth and goodness, beauty and diverse multicultural integrity, in our synergy (B. Fuller), our uniting love. If I am challenged to include you in our shared orthodoxy of truth and kindness and beauty and peace, etc.--the "positive values" then my hope for ecosystemic resilience is dissonant enough to exclude you from your rightful place in our emotionally cooperative integrity space. I tend to over-react to your negative deviance, "All that nastiness, really?!" because of our culturally collective cognitive conspiracy against your access to positive opportunities, "OK, so you are loyal to a fault and a good cook, and the clothes actually do smell and feel better when you do the laundry" although it is the environmental expense that we actually disagree about, whether it is significant to EarthTribe's future, or not or something in between, some caring place that we might actually find and consensually agree about and then go back to those other kinds of sensuality, but I think I have side-railed here. Perhaps we enjoy solidarity in rooting for the underdog in empathizing with those who appear with magical potential for a positive deviant outcome. We so hope the underdog might win this round in part because we thereby retain a ray of hope that we too may someday win with all our undervalued, unsung, underdogged traits, cooperative preferences, nurturing instincts, suffering and struggling with my over-dog egocentric cultural landscapes, my environment, my internally verbalized LeftBrain consciousness. I always cast my sad ego in the role of underdog, just as my RightBrain casts our integral co-empathy in the role of Superdog. This internally chaotic conspiracy of self-doubt about ego's capacity to live healthy, fully, creatively, honestly, compassionately, with appropriate integrity of transparency, without the embarrassment of closeted hypocrisy, dropping our considerable weapons of mutual immunity and cognitive dissonance, is also the boundary face of rediscovering our RightBrain's soul, our Beloved non-verbal Communication center, comprehensively conscious, resonant and resolved, optimized and densely nurturing, only through bicamerally synergetic confluence, active peace, bipartisan liberating mind and conserving body love, integrity of shared meaning and purpose to the very core of our mutually messianic mutually mentoring co-redemptive ego-and-eco balanced chi-soul. Interior Landscaped Ego (left) and Cooperative Exterior Landscaped EcoEarth (right-elder) coincidentally integrate, stir decompose to regenerate.
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