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Poem

It builds inside the bitter-sounding great divide
With pride I hide my amplified disdain inside
I smile like everything's ok but I know it will rain today
Melting through the flooded pores of every long-lost open door

It's hazy like the day you and I just walked away
Clear just like the way I say the future happened yesterday
It cut too deep for common scars tell us who we really are
I'm too defined by pain and wine to take my daydreams very far

Instead I lost my weightless smile to parasitic, hollow lies
Knowing now, exactly why, my heroes always seem to die
And why I lose my sanity within the ghost of every tear 
And where I hid this honesty you see in me between the fear

I'm so far from being cured of this disease in any useful way
I hate myself for being here instead of lying in decay
As you watch me walk away from which I recklessly stray
Knowing that I may be without the comforts of the world today

But even with the better life, I always came back to the knife
No happiness or memories to keep me company at sea
Just broken hearts and shattered lies left in the convoluted wake
The ship has sailed; just take it all; retreating to a calmer lake

I'm left without a single thing to keep me floating in the storm
But I still have those promises I used to say to keep me warm
I may be sad just for a while, but I must go the extra mile
Walk alone through hell and back to keep me sane for just a while

Don't get me wrong; I'm really scared as hell if you can tell
Don't praise this disillusioned dream I sell in the darkest part of a bottomless well
I fell into this broken place devoid of any style or grace
But if I smiled, if you could tell, i'm searching for a better place

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