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Whatever reason it may be, disgusted by life itself, I felt offended being alive and that’s why I opened my heart’s window and watched a passing cloud within the heart. I understand that everything under the sun shall change its shape as time elapses and, the leading stars of the time also vanish to yield their position to new stars as the stage of history revolves, yet still I have a question, why does it have to be that way? On the other hand, though, the circle of human life did not change from the beginning of the time of its conception to very end of everyone’s day, so I have to ask again, why? The answers to those questions, though not conclusive but tentative, came to my mind were, no matter how much the medical technologies may be advanced as men insist, living things never fail to die; and men are always hungry though they eat like a pig because men’s daily bread comes from crops produced in the barren soil. No matter how man beautifies life rhetorically with words such as love, blessing, abundance, and glorify with such communal phrases: god, spirit, holy, or sanctity, men’s life is miserable and hopeless as before because they have to inhale the mass of evil that is filtered through the air to survive. Since no one ever defined explicitly or gave me a straight answer on human life, I have no way to solve the problem of life but to satisfy with the common words ‘life is not different from any other thing.’ But if I comfort myself with a trite remark such as this, isn’t it an act of betraying my mother? Because the mother went through such enormous labor pain in order to bring this helpless child into this world and rose with her whole hearted earnest care to plant hope on this corrupted world.
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