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Every time I sneeze or cough Either my radiator leaks or my exhaust backfires! Shouldn't be a big surprise It's a definite sign we ain't no young chicken no more When you grunt just putting on your socks It's the ninth inning with two men out If you have to turn up the volume on TV Till it shatters the wine glasses in your dining room credenza You are not far from the end Another sign that you ain't no spring chicken Is when you repeat the same sentence twice in a row Is when you repeat the same sentence twice in a row Also when you forget to zip up after you pee What's worse though is when you forget to zip down When everything hurts and what doesn't hurt doesn't work It feels like the morning after and you haven't been anywhere Your knees buckle but your belt won't You sink your teeth into a steak and they stay there You sing along with elevator music You have a dream about prunes Your nose and ears are hairier than your head In dog years you're dead Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional And finally... inside every old person is a young person Wondering what the hell happened! © Jack Ellison 2014
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