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my mind is not here tonight my body is in the cosmos my thoughts as a whole is in a state of free fall yet and still it's alright, i am still alive and thinking there was a time when i thought about the less desirable side of decision there was a time when i looked out the window and thought about the end of reflective pages there was a time when i wanted to dive headfirst in an empty swimming pool yet and still it's alright, i am still alive and thinking i remember when every parking lot i loitered in was flooded with my unshed teardrops i remember when every uncooked lunch bucket i ate was like a five course meal i remember when the water i drunk gave new meaning to temporary yet and still it's alright, i am alive and thinking one woman wanted me to be ready in two years one woman wanted me to refer to her as a male god one woman was indecisive about what she wanted there rest of the women were spinning tops going around in motions yet and still it's alright, i am alive and thinking God reassured me in soft conversations in the middle of many moons God comforted me in blanketed methods in the heart of a few late autumns and full winters God never stopped care for me or loving me despite my falterings, sins, and flaws to Him and am always alright, and as a result i am alive when i am thinking....
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