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My Gorgeous Lotus Blossom !!! There is not a day - glorious or gloomy - that goes by where visions bloom, of your beauty, fill my eye. After these empty, four years, my heart still burns. After these empty, four years, my soul still yearns. After these empty, four years, my spirit still turns over and over and over, yet nothing it learns. Beautiful Lady, why is it that I still love you so ? If you had a love for me, where did it go ? I see you from time to time, we do many things and to my heart, my spirit, joy it always brings. I realize, for you, I will be nothing more than a friend. I am perplexed, why did my last great love come to an end ? I know, while in your youth, you had to live, move on, and without any malice, you had to let it die, be gone. I do, so miss, your beauty, your Asian charm !!! I do, so miss, your Oriental essence upon my arm !!! Knowing, what I do, I wonder why I still hang onto you with such passion, with such delight, what am I to do ? Tell me Xiao Ling, why do I still fight against the obvious ? For I do know, in my mind, there will never again, be an us ! In my dreams, in my heart, in my soul, I cannot give up. For you are my life’s blood, continually filling my cup. Since we parted, I have been living a life of such futility, and I have to wonder ?, just how much of it is insanity. Loving someone like you, for me, what a great force !!! Losing that love, for some, for me, a matter of life’s course. An uneducated, indigent, disabled senior, thirty one year’s difference, I feel, I believe, the core reason why you chose to end our romance. For me my Dear, I never want to end such a beautiful dance !!! Every time I hear your sweet voice, I want another chance !!! Life doth slap this old fool in the face, with your reality. I have to accept, with grace, with me, never again will you be ! I do still love you so !!! This, you, very well know. You permeate ever synapse in my mind. Everywhere I go, everything I do, you I find, like a beautiful ghost haunting every moment, moments were I find, I am content. B. J. “A” 2 July 9th 2014
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