Email Poem

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In through the front door he creeps 
The old girl lies upstairs asleep
Then he hears her call 
In his drunken stupor he falls
Her swear words should carry a bleep.

He's broken her ornamental well 
He hears her shout '' oh effing hell ''
and he can see all her wares 
As she comes bounding downstairs
He's in for a roasting he can tell.

She helps carry him to bed 
But the thought of her boobies won't leave his head
He thought a touch would be nice 
and he did it without thinking twice
She gave a look that would frighten the dead.

He got up and fell in the bath 
It was then he heard her laugh
She said '' that serves you so right''
You can sleep there all night 
He's too sozzled to follow her path.

He woke up at an unearthly hour 
His bladder must have lots of staying power
Relieved he crawled back into bed 
You're bloody freezing she said 
Go get yourself a warm shower.

but he cuddles and spoons 
Singing her favourite tune
Nibbling her ears
and though stinking of beer
She isn't stopping him anytime soon.

No matter how hard he tried
His excitement would not be denied
He caressed her body tenderly 
Kissed her so romantically 
The way he did when she was a young bride.

Be still her beating heart 
Of her he is part
and knowing he resides in that wonderful address 
He states '' I'm forgiven I guess 
She laughs , ''Ask me tomorrow when I've got a full shopping cart.

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