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You know it's ironic,but it just came to my mind that today was the day I said my last goodbye to you,four years you have been gone and I'm ok til it crosses my mind than my heart hurts for the one I love,this is the day that her heart stopped breathing because you no longer would appear before our eyes,with all that has gone on in the last couple of years,before losing you two I felt there was nothing that I couldn't handle,because I was alway's looking out for you two,but now the minutes just become hours the hours become days and those turn into month's for me and finally years,where as most can stop and sit down and enjoy their time with family I feel as if I have to keep going because I don't have that family to sit down on the side and watch the rat race of the world go by,I no longer have that warmth of being able to turn to my past and speak with you who knows me through the years when no one else did I can share my heart only to find like my friendships trying to be misguided,cautious of those I speak with my heart hurts at not having that voice to hear me out,to say I can't lie and say I know what your going thru,but I can give you a hug to show that their are arms out there, to show you,that all though you maybe alone in the world, the weight does not sit on you alone,and when you try to understand people know this you'll never understand people,for all that your mother gave you she tried so hard to protect you from all that she was not sure of,so for all that you will face or see learn as you move through the world be a student of what comes your way,see what she kept you from learning and see why she did it ,try to be as you alway's have been but understand one thing no one will ever understand you,for in so much you have grown but in so many way's you are still like a child yourself learning to understand why people are not whom they seem to be,sleep my child for now you must rest,the day will be new and the problems will be the same,but know that you must alway's remain true to you,be truthful to you and you will have no problem being truthful to others.
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