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Who Am I?


An answer so simple, yet so complex,
Not the reaction one normally expects.
“I am Jason”, but what does that mean?
To truly understand, I must go behind the scenes.

I was 10 years old and becoming obese,
It was then that my confidence would decrease.
Day upon day, suffering from verbal attacks,
My inner peace would melt away, like candlelit wax.
I had reached my threshold; I could take no more,
It was my self-respect I set out to restore.

I was 13 years old and ultimately lost this weight,
At last, all the harassment would finally abate!
But I was wrong, and the attacks would soon begin,
Now at opposite ends of the spectrum, I was too thin.
I just couldn’t win; I felt that I was inferior,
I hated whom I was out on the exterior.

I was 16 years old and confused who I was,
Associating with gang members from the “Bloodz.”
I had found my acceptance amongst a life of crime,
But many were being arrested, forced to serve time.
Desiring a better life, I was in need of correction,
I surrendered my acceptance to gain a new direction.

I was 18 years old and lost with despair,
The journey thus far proved to be unfair.
Others knew what they wanted and went to college,
Without the slightest clue, I became envious of their knowledge.
I couldn’t foresee my future when I didn’t know who I was,
My hope began to dissipate as my life was at this pause.

I was 19 years old and my life began to change course,
It was at this point that I enlisted in the Air Force.
A new man emerged with pride and camaraderie,
With purpose and meaning, my future was no longer a worry.
 The military was my family, raising me to be an adult,
My self-confidence was regained as a direct result.

I was 24 years old with a new “me” in vision,
Ambitious for college, I had made my decision.
Mentally prepared and stronger than ever,
I have committed myself to this newfound endeavor.
Having strong potential I refuse to let go to waste,
My ability for intelligence I strongly embrace.

I am 25 years old and continue to evolve,
But the answer to my question I still cannot solve.
Who I am will forever remain incomplete,
With each day passing is a part of me obsolete.
Like a waterfall, always subjected to new water flowing,
The flow of my experiences will forever keep me growing.
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