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whilst evidence shows that by feb. 1
most of the optimistic individuals who
have swore an oath to themselves 
as well as all those around them
that “come the first of the year, i am gonna
change things,” will in fact,
put a halt to whatever seemingly lofty ideas they had,
that doesn’t mean that they never had them at all.

what it does mean 
is that people had good ideas to better 
themselves, if for only a moment, 
it means that people believed in their own will to 
change
(and you know as well as this writer does that the
will to change is a major first step, regardless of 
when & if change actually occurs---you need to
WANT to make your own life better) 
&
why so many come down on these individuals 
as the first of feb. rears its head
(as if they’d been preying on them the whole
time in the desert,
watching them slowly dehydrate from afar),
should be a cruel mystery to us all.

are not dreams to change things, which inevitably 
may not be fulfilled, 
better than lethargy, submission & ultimately 
self-hatred
(which can lead to destruction of the self or others)?
what vast amount of malicious audacity
it must take
to assert oneself otherwise in this world---
to walk amidst the rest of us with such a 
disgusting, self-righteous nature,
in which one things that they are somehow 
more than human,
somehow,
better than the rest of us.

in the charade parade
(be it the first of a new year or
smack dab in the middle of a present one),
such a person reigns supreme,
until the day someone’s dream finally comes true,
until the day someone becomes strong, their will now
invincible & 
they remember those that were there
kicking them when they were down
saying that they’d never follow through with anything---
ah,
payback is a *****,
isn’t it?

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