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Talk about embarrassment You won’t believe how my day went Joe and I went out to dine Came back at a decent time A storm had come – a storm had gone Left every house with no lights on We hadn’t bothered with a key We count on electricity To open up our garage door That’s all we ever used before Well, Joe had golf with early light We had to get in the house that night We looked for a window we could break Here’s where we made our first mistake The basement windows looked too small There’s no way I could fit at all So a garage window had to do We broke it and I climbed on through Joe’s upset, it cost three bills I’d be dead if looks could kill But bright and early Joe left home And I was left there all alone I called a guy to fix the window But what size, I said I don’t know So into the garage to measure it He said he’d bring me one to fit And with that I hung up the phone Turned to go back in my home But unlike any night before We had set the knob to lock the door I can’t believe – locked out again Just in a towel and bare skin I cracked the back door – looked around Saw no one – I’m backyard bound Back to a basement window sill I have to fit – I hope I will I take a hammer, break the glass Whip off the towel there in the grass I lay it down so I don’t cut My ankles, calves or my bare butt I slither in and hit the floor Into the house through the basement door I quickly dress – the repair man comes And we’ve new windows at quite a sum I learned some lessons as would you If a day like this you had gone through. Know through which window you will fit If it ever comes to it! A basement window costs much less! Never go outside undressed! A towel’s only good inside! Learn the places you can hide! And always carry your house key Or know where an extra one might be ! It bares repeating – when your husband’s gone Don’t get locked out with no clothes on! This actually happened just about as I described to a neighbor of ours. It was years ago and in another state but I still changed names to protect their standing in the community.
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