Email Poem

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Poem
You must love me ? love me, why? as how cruel is my heart,
                 how cruel has my quest for love come to this end...
how cruel that I found my true love only to find his heart numb to my own.

And now why carry on this life knowing this to be true!
I searched forever to find that my true love really exists but how evil is this..

As my quest has taken the women out of me and replaced my being with a harsher me.
That woman I was so long ago still lives within me she just had to go!
And now I stand here before his heaven with no way of entering the future with my true 
kindred soul,

Instead I shall end up in hell with so much woe as he will never love me it is my end I 
know and that's my own sentence forever to be in graved in my heart.
That my quest to find him took me further away from his heart.

Can I change into a bird and fly away tonight unheard?
Can I sink into the ocean and become lost forever in the darkest seas?

It is never to be for some one like me , to hold his hand in mine that fits into my fingers 
in twined,
No babies shall I ever hear cry as that too has been taken from me.

And now my quest to find true love is over, my tears, my broken heart, my fears are not 
finished that is for sure,
As now I have to watch him slowly disappear forever.. into his life,
I shall cry his name into the dark night until my voice has no sound, 
As my quest to find his heart has torn me apart and now that I am so damaged and so 
filled with past hurts..

The path that I took left me this way and now my heart will never be filled by another,
As I found him too late that's my life lesson, that instead of just settling with all the 
wrong hearts and trying to make it  become what it could never be. 

Take me now and let my life in this time be forgotten,as the next life time I shall save all 
the mistakes and stupid heartaches and keep on my quest to find him before any one 
can stop me trick me into false fate.

My end is to never be with the love I have finally found but to spend the next years 
being held by the emptiness of knowing my love is alive but in his eyes I am the walking 
dead..



I wish him love, I wish him peace, I wish i had never found him at all, as the search kept 
me hopeful now I am filled with rage and despair ...... 

If I take my life will it bring me back to the start or will i live forever in this dark black 
cold space as the evil underneath is hell that is for me .. but can it be any more painful 
than my own hell I live in today and now forever more.
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