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Confusion and utter uncertainty is a true pain, all-its- own, but no points or trophies, by the millions each, could amount to the relative peace that I claim today. Because though this dear friend of yours ours you may; or may not believe-in... I do not know, but as for me I have not always been driven to know God, and because of this have found it imperative today to remain as (H)onest as I can with the questions in my life that always kept arising about love and hate, peace, His purpose for me in life, and with family and with people in general and with Him, and I thank Him, because I have discovered and I will admit I could not-ever-have-on-my-own. I found that when to just consider remaining ((O))pen to Him, His will and also, being (((W)))illing to believe that He will sort the mess, the pain out in His time, and being (H)onestly and ((O))vertly (((W)))illing to rely on Him patiently, and listen and place my trust in Him, I say that when I am willing to allow Him, He has never once let me down, and of the lot of the pain of my past, well most of it has been amended and now I stand up boldly behind Him today, on the other side of the majority of it. Even though I do not know fully still the actual realities of it. God is the one who has brought me to this point through this. "Not I"... (Though often times my "EGO" loves to have me believe that I have brought myself). "It usually tries to wake up before me"... ""Every morning"". God be with you friend. If ever you will to, and want to chat sometime. I will be in touch. Please remember though, I do not give advice, I am no PHD. or Doctor of any kind. I am just a person that hears things myself, is willing to listen, and feels things, and I write them down. ~ James ~ P.S. I didn't want to have to take my Meds.... and I, like my Sister am-Bi-polar. It took some time to get the Meds. straight, but now I have balanced out for the most part, and can focus my attentions where they are needed. ""I used to not be able very well to do this. "I try my best now to listen."" "Though some Therapist prescribe pills like candy, I still believe that the majority, do not." Just a little side note. Of all the ones that I have had, to count would be senseless, I trust fully the one that I have now. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Azcy9_F0DCE&feature=related http://allpoetry.com/ban/show/6960
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