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Acquainted with love again I soon recovered from past pain I met this goddess in a tight black dress I peaked Kilimanjaro, at the sight of her, I must confess We exchanged digits and addresses too She said she loved me and I said “I love you” Problem is that she lived in the far away But I said I got to have her as she left with a hypnotic sway So, you guessed it, I placed in a box my healed heart It was as good as new and wouldn’t break apart Sent it to her overseas by FedEx Yep I was horrified at what happen next The bloody plane crashed in the sea With a lone survivor, nobody knew where he could be I hear the sod washed up on an island beach My heart was drenched in tears and out of reach. However, the boxes all wash up on the shore The bugger ripped them open but mine he kept aside on the floor Every box he ripped I felt it in my chest I silently said please, not the one with the gold crest Anyway I think he was feeling what I was going through As he developed a pain in and didn’t know what to do The pain was severe, a bloody tooth ache Which the poor bugger knocked out with the blade of an ice skate My heart was telling him what to do And he knew that this box was now important to him too Eventually he mustered the courage to leave the island on a raft Which took him some time to build but mastered the craft When he left the island he took the box his ball friend, Flintstone And started adrift with a hope to see home A ship found him passed out floating on the sea With a box tightly gripped for her from me They dropped him off in the town where my heart was to be And he made sure he delivered it himself you see But a week later I received a box with a note That sank my heart and choked my throat: “I love you my Sidney but your love was too late” “I finally received it but I couldn’t wait” “I have married now and I hope you did too” “I return your heart and remember that I love you” So if you were ever wondering what was in that FedEx box It was my broken heart wrapped in a pair of warm wooly socks…
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