Email Poem

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Poem

Small achievements as a child
Induced dreams that were wild

Anything possible, the world was my oyster
As long as I didn’t blow it
Keeping up with all of the demands that perfection fosters
Not for anyone else, only to give up on myself

Long years raced by and my craft was honed
Discipline and unwavering expectations
Fabricated into my life all the way down to my bones

Constant diligence to doing the right thing
Always the apt pupil, producing results
Never letting my heart fly or sing
Carefully hiding all of my faults

Didn’t stop after school
This sort of constricted life had become the rule

Miraculously the backdrop and props held up
Beautiful restriction of self awareness
I did what others expected in order to keep it up
Not knowing inside that parts of me were restless

Later, the mold started to crack and shake
My mind was bending and starting to break

Harder to hide behind, the person I had created became ill
Was I sick too, or just my façade?
Each action was questioned with each additional pill
Turned inside out, every thought seemed foreign and odd
I watched from inside as I fell apart

Aware eventually that my life was a lie
Massive amounts of unachievable dreams, like cast away toys
False sense of achievement, trying to reach the sky
I will never be perfect 
Why didn’t I tell myself sooner?

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