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Lord! Why me? I try to live a life free of disorder,
Yet I'm forever greeted by signs reading "Out Of Order!"
Invariably, when I'm confronted with some dire emergency,
I'm faced with that leering sign adding to my urgency!

The interstate sign read, "Rest Area 20 Miles Ahead."
No stopping at the service station - we'll use the rest stop instead.
Ah! At last pleasant relief! We arrive at that convenient station!
Alas, a sign read, "Out Of Order" adding to my frustration!

On the interstate again I experienced mechanical trouble.
Nearby was an emergency phone - I'll get help on the double!
All I could do was stare and gnash my teeth in disbelief!
The dad-gum sign read, "Out Of Order" adding to my grief!

I rose to exercise the freedom of speech that we hold so dear,
To address the City Council and gain their collective ear.
The chairperson said, "You're out of order! Go take your seat!"
The vile thoughts that raced through my mind I dare not repeat!

I've found "Out Of Order" signs on ATMs, military latrines,
Gas pumps, water fountains, coke and slot machines.
Why is it that "Out Of Order" signs are so very rife?
I reckon it's just another one of those vexing vicissitudes of life!

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(© All Rights Reserved)

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