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I know you've heard the nursery rhyme About the Tortoise and the Hare But to let that story end like that Just simply isn't fair You see, the rabbit was quite the cheater He had steroids in his blood The turtle was praying for rain He really wanted a flood Everyone knows rabbits can't swim But the water is a turtle's stage The rabbit found out about this And the bunny was in such a rage He set up several booby traps Along the turtle's path The turtle had many pitfalls Which caused the rabbit to laugh The turtle was a real good guy As everybody knows And the rabbit was the villian Or, at least, the story goes In truth, the turtle lost that day For he didn't finish the race I caught him while I was fishing In my secret fishing place I tried to catch that rabbit But he was way too fast So, I caught that stupid turtle And it only took one cast That turtle begged, "Please let me go so I can be the winner" But the fish just wasn't biting that day So, I ate that turtle for dinner
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