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Perhaps I'm not made for love, a labyrinth where I always lose my way,
The moment I think I've found the chosen one turns into illusion,
The instant I feel I'm in love proves to be just a notion,
And when I open my heart, trust is shattered by gestures that wound me deeply.
I wonder, will I ever know an unconditional, pure, and complete love?
One different from that experienced by my mother, my sister, my neighbors?
What's it like to love without the fear that feelings will be used against you?
What's it like to complement someone, to be yourself, vulnerable yet strong at once?
My heart fears vulnerability, though it knows it's the key to true love,
It fears it won't have the strength to rebuild if it's destroyed again,
But hasn't it done so already? Doesn't it beat now, full of hope?
Doesn't it keep me alive, more than mere existence, pulsing with renewed force?
Perhaps pain has strengthened it, making it stronger than its walls,
Perhaps each disappointment was a lesson, each tear - a drop of wisdom,
And yet, here I am, still searching, dreaming of a love that will heal all my wounds,
A love that will show me I can be myself, without masks, without fear, without regrets.
In the flow of my thoughts, memories intertwine with hopes,
Each experience, a stone on the path towards true love,
Each heartbeat, a step closer to the one who will truly understand me,
And I continue to search, to hope, to love, even though I sometimes fear.
For perhaps that's what love means - the courage to try again and again,
To open your heart, even knowing it could be hurt,
To believe that somewhere, someone will love you exactly as you are,
With all your imperfections, with all your fears, with all your complicated history.
And maybe, one day, I'll understand that love isn't about perfection,
But about acceptance, about growing together, about forgiveness,
About seeing beauty in imperfections, strength in vulnerability,
And then, perhaps then, I'll know I've found what I've always been searching for.
Until then, my heart beats, hopes, loves despite everything,
For in each beat is a promise, in each breath - a new chance,
And I, I am here, open to possibility, ready to learn,
To love, to be loved, to become stronger with each experience.
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