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Poem
Your smile does something to me
Your laugh makes my head spin
How you’re so patient
And I don’t have to say a thing
Even though I’m always overthinking

How your opinion alone is reassuring 
And your presence, 
though it may not be physical, 
grants me peace that I’ve never experienced with an earthly man

Love sometimes is beyond confusing
When you’re not ready for conflicting emotions
When you don’t want it because you don’t know if you can trust again 
You haven’t grown enough for it, maturity hasn’t caught up with you
Yet it still appears from nowhere
Consuming every thought you could have
With fantasies that you fear will never exist
With stomach twisting butterflies from the little things he does 
And you allowed yourself to fall off the side of a cliff for him
The cliff- the stable, comfortable ground
But the falling- the risky, nothing is guaranteed, falling into oblivion, but it’s comforting still for some reason

I don’t crave you just purely for physical desire
You make me feel safe when your arms are wrapped around me
But I get too nervous to ever say that out loud
I crave the emotional connection
The fact that you care
And sometimes I have to ignore it to not fall harder…
Just the thought of you caring is enough to make my knees weak

Maybe because I wouldn’t have fallen for you
I’ve had thought you wouldn’t protect me,
Love me, care for me, understand me, be honest with me, cherish me, and pray for me
I wouldn’t have let myself fall
Or so I’ve told myself
But four years is a long time to think about one single person
The whole time it’s been just you on my mind
I don’t know what God means by it
I don’t know why God brought you into my life
But I’ll cherish you, even if it’s just in my heart, until the day I die
I’ll wait for you as He tells me too
In hopes one day it’ll be just you and me
Though I’m not perfect
I feel like just you were made for me
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