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Personal Note:
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Poem
Sometimes I feel trapped in the inescapable web woven from all the moments we spent together,
I wonder if there's a way to return to those times lost in the abyss of memory,
I think about whether, if I had listened more closely to my inner voice, feeling the ground tremble,
I could have sensed the lava boiling before we turned into a fountain of pain.
I am still willing to walk on your fire, I loved you enough to engrave your name in my soul,
So what does it matter if my feet burn on the path of our shared memories?
I write these lines not to say that I want us to get back together,
But because I never wanted us to be separated, to be two separate shadows.
I never understood what the philosopher meant by "happy enough to die",
Until the day we ran through the flower garden together, laughing and dreaming,
We never had plans to stay together forever, we both knew,
When you said you loved me to death, I didn't know you meant real death.
Now it is clear to me that we have always been the reflection of our best versions,
All we needed was to look into each other's eyes deeply enough to drown in hopes,
But we grew up in a small town without rivers, only tears in eyes and bullets in words,
So we learned to dodge and fire, and swimming was never a dialect.
I know now, when you told me to leave you alone, you wanted me to hold your hand like a lifeline,
But then all I could do was echo your shout, wither when you hesitated,
I wasn't sure of myself back then, and you were sure you hated yourself, doubt and hate met,
I heard you're doing better now, but I don't know where to send my prayers and regrets.
So I leave them in these pages, hoping that someone who knows you better will deliver the message,
For only this way can I hope that you will feel that I wanted to love you and be near you,
In a world where our words were just shadows of our true desires,
Always remaining an unfinished song, carried by the wind of memories to you.
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