Email Poem

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Personal Note:
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Poem

It’s strange, isn’t it?
How someone can live in your heart for years,
Without even realizing it.

I wasn’t looking for a fairytale.
I wasn’t expecting fireworks,
Or a dramatic confession under the rain.
All I ever wanted…
Was to matter to you.
To have a place in your life
That felt a little more permanent.

But here we are.
After all this time,
You look at me and say—
“We can still be good friends.”
Like that’s a reward.
Like that should be enough
To patch the pieces I kept safe for you.

You don’t know
What it’s been like on my side.
Sixteen years.
Sixteen years of memories,
Of growing up with the idea of you—
Of hoping, waiting,
Hearing your voice in every silence.

While you were busy making new friends,
Laughing, moving on,
I was still there—
Quietly searching
For the old you
In every place, every face,
In every version of who you became.

And yet, I never told you everything.
You’ll never know
How many times I replayed our conversations,
How many times I wanted to say more
But stayed quiet…
Because I thought even silence
Was better than pushing you away.

The truth?
I was always afraid—
Afraid to lose even the small version of you I had.
So I settled.
I became the friend, the listener,
The one you could count on…
Even if you never asked yourself
What I needed in return.

But I watched.
From a distance.
Not because I didn’t care—
But because I cared too much
To become someone you’d grow tired of.

People change.
Feelings shift.
You made your choices,
And I never had the right to stop you.
Love doesn’t work that way.
It’s not about holding on tight…
It’s about knowing when to let go
With grace.

I stopped bringing it up.
Stopped trying to make you see.
Maybe you found someone better.
Maybe you just outgrew me.
Either way, I stepped back.
Not because I stopped loving you—
But because I finally learned to love myself too.

You’ll never know
How much you meant to me.
How much you still do.

I’m not here to change your mind.
I’m not asking for anything.
I just want you to know—
No matter what happens next,
You were the most real thing
I ever felt.

And even if I was just a passing chapter in your story…
You were my favorite page.

No anger.
No regrets.
Just love.
Quiet.
Unspoken.
Forever.
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