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Until we came to live in Madrid
We lived with my parents in Vallelado from Segovia
Where my parents had a henhouse
On the outskirts of town
On the left bank of the Arroyo del Horcajo
Sheltered by Cerro de la Bodeguilla.
Vallelado is known nationwide
For its famous "white garlic"
And because all its fellow villagers have
"One ear on each side."
My mother, tired of ordering us:
-Come on, son, daughter, go put the chickens
And see if they've laid eggs.
With my father's consent, she caught
A village helper
Who was somewhat silly, but very noble
Whom they called "the Smart Ass"
Who had only studied elementary school
Whose age was unknown
Well, some said fifteen
And others, forty.
If you asked him:
-How old are you, Pedrito?
He would answer with a foolish expression:
-I'm not old enough. None at all!
My mother was often seen
Walking from home to the henhouse
Or from home to the Cega River
To wash father and sons' clothes
And every two years she would return home
From the river or the chicken coop
With labour pains.
Pedrito "the Smart Ass"
Adapted very well to our house.
Very happy, especially
When my mother said to him:
-Pedrito, if you come home to help us
Taking care of the chicken coop, cleaning it
And bring us the eggs the chickens have laid
We'll give you breakfast, lunch, and dinner
And if you ask for clean clothes
We'll give you a change of clothes.
Overjoyed, Pedrito agreed
And he went off to the henhouse
To see the henhouse, the fifteen chickens
"Whores and divine"
And the two upright "whore-like" roosters
As he himself said.
As soon as he entered the henhouse
He greeted them, saying:
-Good morning have my chickens and roosters.
You already have someone to command you.
Take good care to lay lots of eggs.
And you, roosters
Don't answer me by pecking.
I have a double-edged razor
That I'll stain it with your blood.
Pedrito began separating them and naming them:
-Get up from there, Carmela.
Get up right away
That I want to take the three eggs you laid.
He named the others:
Aurea, Eulogia, Eutimia, Sofronia, Benita
Fermina, Constantina, Gorgomia, Heraclia
Zosima, Candida, Piperia, Trofima, and Tola.
He named the roosters:
Theophanes and Bernardo.
These roosters, Teófanes and Bernardo
If the lady brought a new hen
Bought at the Cuéllar Market
To replace the killed or slaughtered 
To make food or broth
They would fight among themselves furiously
To see who would mount it first.
Teophanes almost always won
Because Bernardo was a saint
Who, humbly, accepted like a monk
What Teófanes commanded him:
-Bernardo, he told him:
 You mustn't crow for seven days
That if you do it
I'll kill you against the henhouse door.
Pedrito seemed to be in love with Carmela
Because, one day
The lady arrived unannounced
Seeing Pedrito with her
Between his legs next to the jock-strap
She asked him in astonishment:
-Who died?
Was it your Carmela who died?
Pedrito answered in two minutes:
-No, my lady. She didn't die.
I'm waiting for her to lay two eggs
To place them in my jock-strap
Because I'm missing them from birth.
My mother didn't know what to do
Whether to turn him around
So he'd let the hen go free
Or piss herself laughing.
Her demons swept my mother in the air
Taking her home laughing
Leaving Pedrito making sense
Of his beloved hen Carmela
Like a pedophile priest with children.
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