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Poem

I lose something at every step towards the future,
I don’t know what or may just not remember,
but I lose it evermore at every step

I can’t say why and I can’t say how for I don’t even know myself,
it’s a curse that consumes me more and more at my every step,
I see the future but I always lurk on the past,
I just wish that I could know what it was that I’m losing

I stare at the future and I reach out to it but something stops me,
a slug of my past drenching me in my pain not letting me leave this plain of former days,
I try to leave it behind but the mark remains,
and as I walk ahead I can’t help but look back once more,
I can feel myself being sent back to the beginning of this everlasting stroll,
It makes me wonder why I'm here in this sadden place

I can’t help but stop at where I am,
I just want to give up and let the past consume me,
but no matter how much I try it just lingers on me not letting me go back further,
It won’t let me go deeper into my former happier life,
It makes me survive another day no matter how much I don’t want to but it makes me regret everything,
It slowly takes a bit of me at every step along the frightful day.

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