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Beauty has an expectation.
It can be damaging and filled with infactuation.
Growing up in a world of a certain dedicated beauty, It can be confusing.
Beauty is defined at first in a home.
It is influenced in tribe, then spreads off to the culture.
Your world become a dystopian.
Clinging, holding, breathing, soon that's really all you know.
The mass of vanity runs deep, its apart of the status quo.
I gotta say it was the shame of me not willing to face the truth in me.
My real identity, loss, confused, paralyzed by Society.
Pride by old paradigms.
Established before I even became on site.
The anger perculates.
The walls I built never even became faint.
Look at that! So pretty!
Its standards of expectations.
You best put on your face again.
Words become frail, while diving into societies standard of beauty.
And yet I would still set sail.
It was a reversal fool's journey.
Inside I was hurting, longing to be seen as only me.
All my awkwardness on my uniqueness even the blemishes, I thought I was the definition of being a mess.
I will hide to go alone with the standards of the world.
Only covering up those delicate parts that shined my authentic beauty.
Call them some distant muck.
Another story I created, what the ?!So many things divide us.
Unrefined beauty should not blind us. The trends of today broke me. I refuse to go alone with the get along, my eyes are as wide open I can honestly see.
I need to really see to.
I need to believe.
I need to push through these strange feelings of energy.
I need to breathe.
I'm tired of making apologies for the beauty I put out.
Its how funny, the different forms of people pleasing I have inside of me.
I'm not making a fool of myself. Dammit. Let me take my time as I grasp this ideal step by step.
Take my time to pull back each layer. Take my time to get comfortable and see.
what kind of beauty I have that lies within me.
Your cruel expectations.
You rush on me with foolish projections. It's the trickster to make me feel your vicious humiliation.
I realize to come to knowing doesn't mean I have to be in an energy of exposing all of me.
Rush into reckless behaviors, so you can look at me, laugh, judge and pity me.
Revealing a side of me freely giving my pride falling into forgets.
Eventually, under that heavy energy of long term regrets.
No, not today.
I have way more inside and blessed with temperance.
Pulling away each layer with such a loving and delicate manner.
I know you see my difference.
Keep showing your truth.
I am a silent observer faithfully, listening to each part of me.
I am slowly discovering the treasure inside of me.
Forgetting the facts, for once in my life it's about my feelings.
It's also about my healing.
The constructs of society really did break me.
It made me question everything.
I gave it all up, including the anger to embrace my healing.
You can't put God in a box and yet today's social mechanisms are nothing but divisions.
Designed to lose sight of our uniqueness.
Societies cling to this box and many don't have the proper fit.
In the end, we are only sinning against ourselves selfishly again.
Well I don't want it.
I'm out this matrix.
I feel so young inside of the mass I wore made me look so old outside.
Ooo, I feel the warmth and the tensions gone.
To see true beauty, I have no glasses on.
Let me take a break and breathe in all this abundance of patience.
How we love ourselves as how things will align.
I'm reshaping.
My behavior and surroundings ( my ecology) are being alchemized.
Keeping my faith and believing in me.
I'm enjoying every moment of my precious healing journey.
The little girl in me is OK to be free no others to find to validate.
Standards of the beauty and people can really be funny.
The pretty girl and pretty boy privilege is the biggest fallacy of today and inauthentic currency.
Societys acceptance defines dfifferently.
I am grateful for my own acceptance that is building within me.
Im at a place where I don't expect anything.
Its a liberating feeling to only receive what truly aligns with me.
Get off of me, get away from me.
I'm embodying respect not someone to throw toxic words of love bombing.


Forgive yourself and love yourself to life
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