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EGBERT THE ADORABLE OCTOPUS & OTHER NONSENSE VERSE

Egbert the Octopus
is so damn cute
& smarter than u
(the point is moot) 
'cause he doesn't pollute
when he commutes, 
only, perhaps, 
when he (ahem)  "poots"! 
—michael r. burch



Monarch
by Michael R. Burch

I had a little caterpillar, 
it wove a cocoon for its villa.
When I blinked an eye
what did I espy? 
It flew off, a regal butterfly! 



Nonsense Ode to Chicken Soup
by Michael R. Burch

Chicken soup
is fragrant goop
in which swims
the noodle's loop, 
sometimes in the shape
of a hula hoop! 

So when you're sick, 
don't be a dupe: 
get out your spoon, 
extract a scoop.
Quick, down the chute
and you'll recoup! 



Preposterous Eros (II) 
by Michael R. Burch

Preposterous Eros, 
mischievous elf! 
Please aim your missiles
at yourself! 

Feel the tingle, 
then (take it from me) , 
you'll fall in love
with the next hussy you see! 

She'll spend your money, 
she'll take your car...
you'll soon end up alone
in a sad little bar.

Preposterous Eros, 
mischievous elf! 
Please aim your missiles
at yourself! 



I was so drunk my lips got lost requesting a kiss.—Rumi, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch



The Inconstant Cosmologist 
by Michael R. Burch 

An incestuous physicist, Bright, 
made whoopee much faster than light. 
She orgasmed one day
in her relative way, 
but came on the previous night! 



Pale Ophelias
by Michael R. Burch

Ever in danger of a lethal tryst, 
with a comical father crying, "Desist! "
We're all pale Ophelias in the mist.

"Children, be careful! " our mothers insist, 
and yet we plow forward, in search of bliss, 
ever in danger of a lethal tryst.

"Remember Eve's apple, " some inner voice hissed, 
which of course we ignored, the prudish miss! 
We're all pale Ophelias in the mist.

Such a sweet temptation! , and who can resist
the enticements of such a delectable dish, 
whatever the dangers of a lethal tryst? 

"Stay away, Cupid! " With a balled-up fist, 
we lecture the stars when things go amiss.
We're all pale Ophelias in the mist.

Lovers are criminals & need to be frisked! 
We're up to the task, like lobsters in bisque.
Ever in danger of a lethal tryst, 
We're all pale Ophelias in the mist.



U.S. Travel Advisory
by Michael R. Burch

It's okay
to be gay, 
unless, let's say, 
you find your fey
way
outside the Bay.
They
will want you to pray
to their LORD, or else pay
for the "wrong decision." Stay
in San Fran, or maybe LA.

Keywords: nonsense, humor, light, goop
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