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My Man Jim would come home drunk
One time I got into my car, found a body in the trunk.
But I remembered what I was told by Grandpa and Gran:
Never let details stop you standing by your man.

I followed him one night, I lost a friend's bet
He came out arm around a glamorous brunette
I confronted him later, I said "I'm your biggest fan
so I'll cry a river, but I'll stand by my man."

He liked to gamble, lost it all online
To make it up I had to work two jobs, not to mention overtime
My friends said "if you stay, you need a head exam"
But I never let details stop me standing by my Man.

One day in his sleep he confessed that in the fall
He planned to vote for Donald Trump, wanted that border wall
I exploded, shot Jim's dog, And Nellie, his beloved horse
Then threw out the family photos and filed for a divorce.

I went to the cemetery, said to Grandpa's stone
"I'm sorry, I tried, but that bird has flown"
Then two voices spoke as from a distant star
"We would forgive you, heck, we voted for FDR
But still, there's one thing we can't endorse
That's what you did to the dog, and Nellie the horse."

Thunder rolled and lightning flashed
The rain beat down, trees were smashed
The twister landed my car upside down with a thump
But what else could I have done; it was Donald TRUMP!

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