Email Poem

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Personal Note:

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Poem

After getting an urgent phone call
jumping in my car and rushing to 
pick my son up and get him to 
the ER, I am waiting again

He is hurting badly, 
and my mama’s heart
is breaking for him, yet,
I am waiting again

After many tests and 
very compassionate
treatment and a psych eval,
I am waiting again

Waiting for the hospital 
to release him to go home,
he is physically feeling better,
yet, I am waiting again

Waiting for something that I
can’t force, although, I have
tried before, it doesn’t work
and here I am waiting again

A kind hospital employee pulled 
me aside and compassionately
told me that this is not my choice, 
it is only his, and I am waiting again

Waiting for him to be ready to 
change his life for the better
and leave the alcohol and drugs behind
but I AM waiting again

Waiting for what could be a tragic
phone call or home visit telling
me that it is too late, I am left
Waiting again

I know in my heart and mind
that only he can make this choice
and while I understand this, 
I am waiting again

Living my life knowing that
a part of me is in such dire
circumstances and danger, leaves me
Waiting again

This is not what I was hoping for 
my child’s future and it 
brings me so much pain to be
Waiting again

Waiting and praying and just
being here when he needs me,
each time being crushed
when I am left waiting again

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