Email Poem

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Poem

I want to scream
I want to cry
I want to curl up
I want to die

With every waking moment
I’ve awoken sad
I can hear my thoughts
And they are all bad

With my thoughts taking over
And I slowly succumb
I can finally be at peace with myself 
My eyes dilate as my soul is disappearing 

I’ve only worked to live
To touch and to feel
What life would be like
If only I was real

At long last I’ll see better days
Ones I’ll finally understand 
To taste those strawberry flavoured lips
Maybe things will make sense 

I always feel like  when I’m hidden away
I feel as if I’ll never be apart of what’s been built
I’ll never be accepted because of who I am
But I’ve been told to persevere 

I am not the strong person people make me out to be
I am not the smart person think I am
I am a simple nobody 
I will waste away

I thought I was done with this depression
I thought I couldn’t let it consume who I am if I’d forgotten 
But I can never forget
I can never let go of this feeling

The feeling of not being enough 
The feeling of being dirty
Or Ghetto
Or unworthy 

I have to try
I’ve been trying
But I can only try for so long
I’m delaying the inevitable 

I’ve fought so hard
Just to be back at square one
It sucks to know that my life was a waste
That I didn’t make my impact

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