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Poem

Look at her again, being out of the ordinary 
No one needs that, eyes down til it passes

You too, despite your centre stage position 
You're looking to the heavens
But you have nothing to hold onto
That beast is just tolerating you as a burden
Anyone who saves you will just prop you up
It's devastating, but you need to look at yourself 
Hear that "look at yourself!"

It's easy on a day like today
With strength shown in all things
But I fear tomorrow, that's why I plead
But I shall look at myself
In context, based on my findings
I shall figure myself out
The judgement I fear, the failure I fear 
What does that matter when I look at this moment
So fragile, needlessly fragile

I've coped with everything but fear
The actuality of a problem doesn't faze me
I'd be safer leaping from this spot
I should make an actual commotion 
Holler it all out
Scare man and beast and onlookers

How I want to scream until the sun sets!
Wake up empty of this, with space made
I'll wave my arms and stamp my feet
Let them all run, I'd rather know
I'm so sick of apologising 
It's ill thought through
But I don't want to relive today
Or this absence of the feel of home
Over and over until I'm branded "this type"

I'm just in the wrong place
And the sun will set on this day
Or one like it
And there will be a new day 
And they'll say "she's out of the ordinary"
That's a given
But there's no place I'd rather be out of

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