Email Poem

Your IP Address: 3.145.28.3
Your Email Address:
To Email Address:
Subject
Personal Note:
Poem Title:
Poem
Imagine - trying to be profound
I feel it's automatic failure by applying effort
That all sounds like a me problem
Both with automatic failure
And judgements 
I could have an existential crisis, but I'll hold it off

Imagine instead, being happy with efforts to be profound
Finding acceptance
That would surely be lovely 
I'm all bristly with the standard of 'nice' and 'lovely' - a horror upon myself again 

Imagine being less aware - I push out these thoughts on little boats experimentally rather than any belief they float 
I'm suiting myself by exposing my awkward inner monologue - oh so self obsessed (there's a little arguement, that this oversharing could validate a similar mind or intrigue a different one or indeed allow a polished poet a feeling of superiority or sometimes bite a person who judges my choice to share self in this way when my thoughts land well - oh and of course I'm fully aware few will read beyond my 'nothing good here's first line/s)... Where am I, I drifted off...

Imagine not having excruciating self awareness alongside a strange urge to say and do things anyway, which is strangely rewarded by affirmation, joy or praise alongside an inner monologue of intense criticism and fear of rejection. Pushing on with being myself despite what feels like innate knowledge that I am an automatic failure, with a confidence that is in constant battle. Then this hyper vigilance for watching reactions, double checking proof that results in me managing another day as I'm gratiously accepted and kept afloat by positive feedback

Imagine if everything that keeps me afloat were true
And I exchanged my negative inner monologue for comfortable passage through this life 
Would I be better or worst for it?

Imagine all those trying to be profound need affirmation too
Imagine I'm not as alone as I think
Maybe I invest in feeling different 
Maybe it's all my fault... (Oh shut up self)

Whatever this poem is
I don't really judge as negatively as I accuse myself of
I just think too much
And fear harsh judgement 
So consider how others may be judged
Which will mean whatever it means
So present, on occasion, unattractive representations of myself 
To see whether I could blow it so easily
Maybe if more stepped out of comfort zones
And people stopped pleasing with warped ideas of what is pleasing 
The veil would be lifted 
And challenge and honesty as well as beautiful unadulterated love would fill us all up
CAPTCHA Preview
Type the characters you see in the picture
Required