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Poem

I do not wish to proffer an explanation 
What I wish to do is stand still a moment
Whilst you now observe me

I have this vantage point

Aware yet blind to perspective
We both presume
What I hope to divine

Though lost to the rational or the magical

With a haze of stars, offensive in their number
The peripheral transposed as empty plains
I sense the absurd, I feel it - it's a terror

Standing still, by choice

Feeling abandoned & separate from most everything 
I picked my shade of blue for this day
And so I dwell there 

These four walls not making me feel safe

Forever aware of the plank I could walk to nowhere 
As I wait for any form of lightning to strike
The moonlight has on occasion comforted

The light stopping at the external wall

Inside is dark with nothing but thoughts 
So I stare out at the terrain
Knowing there's nothing more in every direction 

Whilst immersed in intensified nothing

In the guts of it all, churned up
It's sedate from the outside looking in, I'll give it that
But there's an absence of warmth

And a loneliness I can't convey 

I could talk to the only other soul here 
But as I looked at their expression 
My heart sank and I turned away

In that moment everything set

Permanence became of the stillness
And in it, all I can do is contemplate my fate
Quite alone, not letting anyone in

Safe as houses, so no help comes

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