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I will come back for you, you said. Those words echoed in my head like a ringing in my ears after an explosion. 
Those words filled me until I realized they didn't mean anything. 
They were just air but lacked the same importance that air had. 
I held onto those words as if they were equivalent but once these eyes realized, I released them into the night sky. 
Oh, how beautiful did those lies look swirling amongst the stars.
The door wasn't always open, and I couldn't chase after you.
Instead, I stayed and endured the destruction that was within these four walls, grasping at what I saw others had, an aching yearning feeling in my chest that traveled to my throat. 
If I would have clawed it out of me would that have made me a savage?
A savage looking for its creator.
I can't help the thought that if I looked at you, I would look away because you look just like her.
Every day I faced my mirror to see nothing had changed, I'm still bound to this identity that seemed attached to dysfunction. 
When the mirror grinned with a smile, I did not recognize I met its gaze with my fist.
The reflection wasn't me but the savage they wanted me to be.
I did not want to be bound to this brokenness even though it grasped for my embrace.
As the sandman weaved dreams, I found me alone in the stillness of the dark, unafraid as I found nights gentle heartbeat soothing. In the arms of night, I found friends, one called night and the other called me.
But I refuse to be their savage, I will not allow you to claim creatorship because I am not your finished product rather an art under construction, that is mine to claim.
I suddenly came up for air, having been lost at tide for so long.
The pain in my back was no longer the same, 
no longer from others or from a star's unfulfilled wish but from the wings that grew, taking me in flight.

They carried me out of the garden that claimed to be my roots.
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