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I will never forget the day about
a year ago, I returned to a place
that used to be my house and home.

With my bride of 50 years by my side,
I tried to describe to her how I felt.
It was a very somber experience,
rather strange and feeling all alone.

It came suddenly and was not anticipated.
So, I wrote this letter and sent it 'Home'.
Since 'Home' is long gone and cannot read it,
perhaps on behalf of 'Home', you will read it.

Dear Home.

Long had been the years that we were apart.
It wasn't your fault, and I'm not trying to
blame, but you never felt like a home to me.

Judgment was plentiful, but mercy was rare.
God had His reasons for my being born in you,
But you were a place I didn't want to be from;
a place where some of the people were smooth,
but the way of life and livelihood were rugged and rough. 
The social structure was demeaning and dehumanizing.
Although my family and our friends were among the greatest,
there was still a void that had stuck with me for years.

I suspect that if you were still around, you would
readily say, "I'm sorry for the way it was back then".
I would tell you joyfully that many things have changed.
We would share a meal and have a very pleasant exchange.


Anyway, most people that I once knew are now long gone,
and I have no connection with those who are still around.
Please be aware that I began a quest 15 years ago to find
them. I felt that revisiting them and you would be very fulfilling
and would bring a fresh form of closure to my life.  In spite of 
the unexpected emotions, I still feel that way.

It is an emotional quest to revisit and rediscover you.
It is piercing my soul deeper than I thought it would,
but it is a journey I must take. It is a therapeutic
quest that I must experience.

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