Email Poem

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Poem

I dreamt I saw you
And you talked to me
Even though I was hurt
And my eyes were full of tears in that dream
And I was leaving you because I was not ok
It felt like my turmoiled emotions were lightly caressed and embraced
Waking up I felt strangely satisfied
Something I haven't felt since I lost you
And that's just too many years ago
I knew we had a toxic association 
But half of me can't figure out if you were toxic too
Even though I was broken in my little ways too
Making myself prey to those who were preditors
And I can't for the life of me figure out if you were just preying on me 
If me and you meant nothing to you
When we meant the world to me
And maybe I know and I am a little too afraid to accept the truth
And maybe I am just totally incapable of accepting it
Because in this lifetime nobody does but you
And I can't be with anyone else
And that's a scary thought
And I want to break from this misery
Because nobody deserves to hurt me like that
And gets to live without losing me
Call me a coward
But even though the story of my life reads like a disjointed paragraph
I believe it was necessary to lose you

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