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Poem
What are the feelings that I feel
Just that light is cast and I am real
I lingered for so long in the shade
Believing that was a choice I made
Always afraid I have hidden intent
Hidden from myself even what was meant
Do I let free an unfiltered me
Deal with resulting flock and flee
I appreciate people, just like art
Are received differently from heart to heart
Just as streams of people may pass by
Some may stop and form reply
Of impact that you've had on them
Speak of value, not condemn
I fear all my eccentric traits
Drag me down like leaden weights
But here I finally can explore
Perhaps I'm just poetic so can act out more
No more reining myself in
Embracing who I am, or at least begin
To recognise I'm a bit strange
But does perfect really engage
Usually I tell myself to just stay quiet
Not share my weirdo mindscape riot
It's not that my feedback is even bad
But I ruminate afterwards then feel sad
I'm not saying what normal people say
I rip up and throw convention away
What even is all this about
Am I a narcissist or just full of self doubt
I can't be full time in my sensible shoes
But is the alternative being blistered and bruised 
I just know I can't bore myself to death 
My epitaph reading I was thoroughly nice til my last breath 
I want to stop analysing after I speak
Stop deciding I've been a total freak
It's exhausting always going through that
Perhaps that's where the logic for seeking validation is at
"Am I ok? Was it ok what I said just then? 
Do you like me? Can I come back again?"
I need to shed the apologetic game
Constantly worrying, feeling shame
Somehow arrive with myself in tow
Let people like me or choose to go
I adore authenticity as a personality factor
Embracing my own is what I'm after
I'm getting lazier with these rhymes
It's another defence, I purposely deter at times
Announcing here's a theoretic negative review...
I'm just too much, don't save me, save you
But I'm considering this whole new leaf
(Although I've broken rule 1, which was keep it brief)
I might be a combo of the good/annoying in equal measure
But being a mixture is what in others I treasure
Having an edge to make a spark
Keeping myself out of the dark
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